Going to the cinema is expensive, buying DVDs is expensive, renting movies is expensive and torrenting is illegal (and, more importantly, doesn’t guarantee good quality sound and image). Luckily, films sometimes appear on TV. Here’s the best one this week.
Friday 14th December
Film4: 9.00pm – 10.55pm
Congratulations, we’ve reached the middle of December and – for those reading this – we’ve at least made it in one piece. Christmas is fast approaching, and the number of steaming piles of turd that pass themselves off as films inches ever closer towards breaking point.
This week’s Christmas-themed pick of the week (note to editor, this is getting difficult), is Hot Tub Time Machine. “But that’s not a Christmas film”, you might say, to which I would retort “there’s snow in it, and it was between this and ET”. You might also complain about the breezy misogyny in this gross-out guy comedy, but heck, I like it, and this is my pick of the week, so I’m going to impose my will on it like George Osborne on the economy. Albeit to a less catastrophic ending.
John Cusack takes centre stage as three old friends go back to relive their youth, ending up – via a quirk of energy-drink induced magic – in 1986. There are a solid nine laughs at least in this film (I counted them) and really, what more can you ask for in a comedy film these days?
My alternative pick for the week is the seminal, Ice Cold in Alex, on Film4 (Monday 17th, 3.55pm – 6.35pm). Unfortunately this is not a pornographic film featuring the One Show’s Alex Jones doing lascivious things with a range of ice lollies (one can dream). No, this is the rather brilliant war-time action drama starring John Mills. You can boil the story down to one man’s epic journey for a pint, (if any ad people from Strongbow see this, throw some money my way before running with it) and given the weather, the epic recession, and the fact that we’ll have to endure another month or two of Gangnam Style – replete with every tosser on the planet dancing like a priapic cowboy – then that simple desire for alcohol is something I have only the highest measure of sympathy for.
This was written by Robert James Taylor. He is, for all intents and purposes, a human.